Dear Wanda,

I have a major stressor in my life. Around the time of homecoming weekend I developed a crush on my best friend's big brother. After my friend found out, freaked out, and convinced me her brother did  not have feelings for me I decided to stay with my current boyfriend. Then I found out that the big brother really does feel the same as me and now I'm not sure what to do. I respect my friend's wishes, and I like my current boyfriend a lot but I also like her brother a lot too. Now that he likes me too I need some help on my decision.


                                                                                 Signed,
                                                                                     Boyfriend baffled

Dear Boyfriend baffled,

The number one key component to a good relationship is honesty. You owe it to yourself and your current to boyfriend to break things off with him if you are starting to have strong feelings for another guy. No one at any age deserves to be cheated on or put through a dishonest relationship. If you end things with him now it will be easier for you to see who you really want to be, and who knows? It may turn out you don’t want to be with either of them.

It is important to remember you are in high school and still have plenty of time to find “Mr. Right.” So for now, just have fun. There is no need to jump into a relationship right away so get to know your brother's friend on a “strictly friends” basis first and that will help you find if you are more compatible with your current boyfriend or the brother.

As for your best friend, once the shock of the idea wears off she should be able to come to terms with you liking her brother. Your happiness should be enough for her to accept the idea. If you do end up deciding to be with the brother just remember, spare your friend the mushy details of your relationship. No sister should be subjected to hearing about her brother's love life.
                                                                                 Best of luck,
                                                                                          Wanda




Dear Wanda,

I have liked a guy since summer. He will never give me a chance. I text him all the time, but he doesn’t always text back. I just don’t understand why he likes her. She is so overprotective of him, and has even threatened to beat me up. They have broken up many times but she always gets him back in the end. During the summer we experienced a magical moment together. I want him so bad!!
                                                                      Signed,
                                                                           Needs Help

Dear needs help,

Liking a taken man always creates a sticky situation. In the end one person will end up with a broken heart, so you need to decide if this guy is really worth the pain he causes you. It sounds as though this guy does have feelings for you he just doesn’t know how to break free from his overprotective girlfriend. So, you will need to decide if you are willing to wait for him until he finds a way out of his current relationship.

His girlfriend sounds like a time bomb waiting to go off. If she is already threatening you, you may want to steer clear of both of them for a while to avoid from getting hurt both emotionally and physically. If his girlfriend makes you fear for your own safety do not hesitate to get help from an adult. No one should live in fear.

Your best bet is to continue texting him every once in a while letting him know you are still there, but don’t get too close just yet. You need to give him the space and time he needs to break up and move on from his current girlfriend. I wish you the best of luck with him, and I really do hope you get your man. If you're ever feeling down just think back to your magical moment you shared this summer.
                                                                               Yours truly,
                                                                                       Wanda